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(I) Texas

However [political parties] may now and then answer popular ends, they are likely in the course of time and things, to become potent engines, by which cunning, ambitious, and unprincipled men will be enabled to subvert the power of the people and to usurp for themselves the reins of government, destroying afterwards the very engines which have lifted them to unjust dominion.


George Washington (I) USA warned against political parties becoming too powerful.

One of the reasons I haven’t written much lately is that I’ve been worried about the caustic nature of our political discourse. It seems that we can no longer talk rationally about our disagreements. That worries me. Political discourse is supposed to be the means by which we resolve our differences—or, at least, reach a mutually “acceptable” compromise.

But it’s hard to overcome our differences when we start by throwing verbal acid in the face of anyone who disagrees with us.

Even though venom has replaced logic in our political arguments, we have not yet reached the depths of 1856, when Representative Preston Brooks caned Senator Charles Sumner almost to death in the US Senate. We may see that level of strife again if we cannot learn to talk out our differences again.

One thing you learn in this business is that approaching “negotiations” with a “my way or the highway” attitude seldom yields the desired results. Even though it does on occasion make the “winning” party feel superior, it cannot be sustainable.

I believe my hero Mark Twain once said, “Most people get their opinions on politics second hand with little thought from people who acquired them the same way.” That’s why I urge you to listen to someone who disagrees with you. Listening to and acknowledging when such a person has a point is not being “politically correct.” Being “politically correct” comes from listening only to those who already agree with you and ostracizing anyone who is not conservative or liberal enough for your ideology.

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But What About Your Dog?

A very big dog sniffs the camera.

This is Alfred, our newest rescue. He’s just under a thousand pounds of love and gratitude. He’s not nearly as skinny now as he was a week ago. I don’t know I what I would do in a situation like Dave’s.

We talk all the time about a win-win scenario. It’s part of our core business philosophy, and it’s just plain good business. One of the key factors in securing a deal, any kind of deal, is understanding the other person’s needs. In short, empathy.

This story comes from our friend Brent Mott. I think it originates with one of his mentors in the real estate business. I’ve taken a couple of liberties in retelling it.

The story goes like this: Continue reading →

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Burning Questions

In the past few weeks, I have been learning some sales and negotiation techniques, and one of the class topics has me thinking about questions. Our work involves asking a lot of questions, whether of colleagues, contractors, potential sellers, or potential buyers. I’ve always known this was a weak area of mine—I had relatives who asked me so many questions every time I saw them that it felt more like an interrogation than a conversation. They always seemed to be looking for me to give their “right” answer before they’d move on. So, in response, I ended up avoiding asking many questions, preferring to figure things out for myself during the course of conversations. I have been question impaired.

Questions within questions. We have to pay attention to answers to succeed, so I say.

No doubt my overly subtle technique works with friends and family. But in the real estate investment business, you often need to know certain things in order to make sound decisions, to figure out someone’s motives, or to simply gain confirmation on an assumption.

One of the classes I took went over a lot of different types of questions that will help you achieve your goals. This means you have to know what your goals ARE before you start. That may have been the most important lesson I learned—to prepare for conversations before you have them. The instructors spent a lot of time going over the advantages of practicing your questions and role-playing in advance. I assure you that’s not my idea of fun, BUT, I do see how it could get you to run on auto-pilot on some of the trickier nuggets of information you want to find out, allowing you to do the other important thing…

…and that is to listen to the answers to your questions. It should come as no surprise that many folks start planning their next sentence the moment it’s their conversational partner’s turn to talk. Well, if you’re using carefully crafted questions to build rapport or inspire a decision that meets your needs, you better be sure you are paying attention to the answer you get.

As I get ready for a lot of in-person practice on all the questioning techniques soon, you can bet that I’ll be paying a lot more attention to my own conversations. I already have been breaking out of my questioning comfort zone, and I have made it one of my goals this week to enrich myself by really listening to the answers to my questions. I can learn something new from everyone I talk to. So can you.

So hey, if you have any questions for us here at Hermit Haus, we are always listening! You can call us at 512-807-8777, add a comment to this or any other blog posts (in English rather than Russian, so we’ll know you are real), or pop us an email at info@hermithaus.com. We have the answers to all your burning questions, to paraphrase Garrison Keillor.

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